Are your fan page invites annoying your friends?

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by Peter Fletcher on January 22, 2010

On Facebook yesterday I received yet another suggestion from a “friend” to join their fan page. It was the umpteenth such suggestion. As I was exhausted from hitting the Ignore button I decided to send a direct message. It said simply:

Hi Kim (not their real name),

I’m really happy to be your FB friend but would you mind not sending me invites to your FB page.

Thanks

Peter

Sure I could have gilded the lilly, wrote some crap about how lovely their page looked and how I just can’t possibly add another page to my newsfeed. Perhaps I should learn to be more diplomatic. Instead I chose instead to state clearly the action I wanted them to take. Their response was to de-friend me. Instantly!

It was an immature response. Rather than simply respecting my wishes their choice was to cut me off completely. It’s not how the “social” part of social media works.

There are a couple of lessons here for Page owners. First, don’t piss your friends off by constantly inviting them to join your page. Sure, suggesting your page to friends builds fan numbers. It’s a proven strategy. But once you’ve invited them, back off. Don’t push it too far. If you do you’ll start alienating people.

Second, if you get a message asking you not to send page suggestions don’t take it personally. Respect your friend’s wishes and look for other ways to grow your fan base. Remember, thick skin good, thin skin not so.

There are ways Facebook could help page owners. First, they could add an “invite pending” indicator to a friend’s profile pic. Currently when suggesting a page to friends those who are already fans are displayed with a slightly opaque profile pic and can’t be added to the invite list. Facebook could add a similar function with the invite expiring after a period of time, say a month or three.

Facebook could also add a “block page suggestions from this person” button. This would mute out serial page-suggesting admins. They’d never know their message wasn’t getting through. But then again they probably wouldn’t care.

Photo credit: http://www.flickr.com/photos/barelyfitz/ / CC BY 2.0

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  • jaso32

    What's the point of social media if you can't share links with your friends? Sure some go over the top with requests to join their business page every other day but surely if you are their friend you would have already joined their page?

    I receive a request to join a competing web developers fan page once a week but it's really something I'm not comfortable with. Sure I can keep up with their business news through it but I know they are the type to judge the success of the page by how many fans they have so I reject the request. Every week. It doesn't bother me. I spend every day clicking ignore on a few requests, from event invites to app requests.

    If, for you, it's a case of an already full feed then join and hide it. All gone, no worries.

    I understand why they unfriended you. This sharing is how they get value for their time on Facebook. You didn't want to be apart of that. I assume is person was barely an acquaintance. Instead of 2 little clicks with the mouse you took the time to write. I think you worry too much.

  • ladymixy

    I agree. No means no thanks.. really.

    IMO, if page owners need to consistently re-send invites in a short insufficient time space, perhaps they need to rethink their page/product, or think about who they are targeting when sending invites rather than “select all”.

    That being said, there is the “Ignore all invitations from this friend” under every type of invite, which avoids the awkward note to “friend” business. If they've defriended you for it, they've just taken the social out of social networking!

  • http://www.brand5.com Mark Faggiano

    Peter-

    I've had this happen several times lately as well. The most diplomatic thing to do is to accept their request and then hide their news from your feed. That way the requests stop and your feed won't be cluttered with stuff you probably won't read anyway.

    One other thought on this: fan pages should grow organically because a person or company actually has fans. Chances are if someone needs to beg their friends to become fans, their fan page is a temporary hobby (as opposed to a serious part of their marketing plan). I'd be willing to be that person that bugged you will have a neglected fan page in 6 months.

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